Title: "Iris" (for the moment... see Author's Note)
Author: JakieMC (Megan)
Pairing/ship: Skate
Status of fic: One-shot - finished.
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Don't think there's any...
Disclaimer: I do not own ‘Lost’ and that the characters, rights and the television show all belong to JJ Abrams, Damon Lindelof, Touchstone, ABC and co.
Author’s Notes/Summary: OK, I wrote this one-shot for my friend's birthday (she's a Kacker). It's Skate and angsty (I hope), but I'm not sure about it... would you mind reading it and telling me if there's anything you'd change (ASAP if possible - I'm away from Wednesday!)? I'm not too fond of the ending... It'll either be called Iris or Drops of Jupiter because I was listening to "Iris" by the Goo Goo Dolls and "Drops of Jupiter" by Train while writing - which one do you prefer?!



2 days ago, Kate’s life had changed. For the better or worse, she did not know, but she knew it had changed. 2 days ago, Kate, Jack and Sawyer had been released from the Others, apparently physically unscathed. Physically unscathed, but maybe not mentally. Kate couldn’t stop thinking about what had happened back there, what she had done… what they had done. She could see him now, sitting across the beach from her, there in his tent. He was reading, his glasses rested across his nose. It had been two days since she had last spoken to him – through no fault of Sawyer’s: Kate was deliberatley avoiding him. She needed to work out her feelings; she needed some time away from him. Separation wasn’t working; he was all she could think about. Every time she closed her eyes, or her mind wandered, she could feel his lips on hers, his hands on her skin; touching her roughly yet still gentle. Sex with Sawyer was everything she had thought it would be – everything she craved and yet everything she feared. And yet she couldn’t resist… she couldn’t control herself; fight her urges. And then she had pushed him away – she had blanked him. She had used him. It wasn’t because she regretted it – she knew that for sure. She was scared. Scared of the emotions he made her feel. Emotions she couldn’t control, and Kate hated not being in control of her life. Sawyer made her feel things she’d never felt for anyone before and she didn’t know how to deal with it; she didn’t know how to react. So she’d pushed him away; pushed him out of fear and now she was regretting it. She needed to speak to him, needed to let him know how she felt. It was the only way she could get this empty, guilty feeling out of her body. Kate stood up, took a deep breath, and started walking.

Sawyer opened his book and began to read. He needed something – anything – to distract him from his thoughts. It was no use… his thoughts overcame his every futile attempt to ignore them. The words on the page floated in and out of his brain – he had no idea what they were. He was determined to keep going… he didn’t want to think about her. He hated to admit it, but it hurt too much to think about her, and yet he couldn’t stop. When they were in captivity, he thought she was finally returning the feelings he had for her, but she had pushed him away, used him for her physical needs. He didn’t know why he had thought sex with her would be anything other than sex for her – she’d always be “Jack’s girl”. She’d gone straight back to Jack. She’d never be his, she’d never return the feelings of love and affection he so deeply craved to give her, let her know how he felt. Another failure to add to the list, he thought; the one girl I’ve ever felt anything for and she’s in love with someone else. He was angry with himself for giving in to his needs like he had… it had made his life a lot harder lately. Hell, Kate hadn’t spoken to him for the past two days – his desires had lost him the only person he’d ever been close to. He glanced up –she was walking towards him. He quickly went back to “reading”.

“Sawyer?” Kate waited tentatively at the entrance of Sawyer’s tent. Sawyer didn’t look at her and continued with his book.

“You talking to me now Freckles?”

“Sawyer I need to speak to you… privately. Can I come in?” Sawyer put his book down and took off his glasses. He looked at her. She looked tired and unhappy.
“Sure.” He got up and moved to the other end of the tent, his back to her. He couldn’t be near her; he couldn’t handle it. Kate walked in and pulled the “door” closed. This was going to be harder than she thought – he couldn’t even look at her.

“Sawyer… I…” she began, her voice shaking.

Sawyer turned round, anger in his eyes. He couldn’t do it – he couldn’t stand there and listen to her apologise for sleeping with him. Telling him it didn’t mean anything and she was sorry if he thought it did.

“Don’t, Kate, just don’t. This is the part where you tell me that you’re sorry and that it didn’t mean anything, right? Let me save you the trouble so you can go running back to Jack without any guilty feelings left behind.” Tears were welling up in her eyes.

“Sawyer, please, just listen to me..” she said, taking a step forward and placing a hand on his arm. He shook it off and scowled at her.

“Listen to you?! What good’s that gonna do me? Or is this just something you have to do, so that your conscience is clear?” he said sarcastically. “Well lemme tell you something, sweetcheeks, I ain’t gonna sit here and listen to you pour your heart out just so you feel better about yourself. Sure ain’t gonna do me any good is it? But then that’s you all over ain’t it sweetheart? As long as you’re ok, no-one else matters, right? Go talk to Jack, I’m sure he’s sitting waiting for you with a hot cup of cocoa and a shoulder to cry on.” He turned round again and began angrily moving stuff around. None of it needed to be done, he was just looking for a distraction.

Kate paused, mixed feelings building inside of her. She wasn’t going to walk away – that was what he expected. “You’re wrong, Sawyer”. She said quietly.

Sawyer glanced over his shoulder. “Wrong? You wanna explain that one to me Freckles? You forget I know how your mind works – you and me; we’re too similar. I don’t wanna deal with your crap, so just make your apology or whatever it is you’ve come to do and leave. I got things I need to be doing.”

“Would you shut up and listen to yourself!?”

Sawyer turned round in surprise. “ ‘Scuse me?!”

“You think that just because I haven’t spoken to you for a couple of days, you think I hate you? You think all I need is to just tell you I’m sorry for everything that happened and then I can go on with my happy little life and forget everything that happened between us?! Well you’re wrong Sawyer!” Kate could feel the tears building up and her voice began to tremble. “I can’t stop thinking about it… us…you. I came here to tell you how I feel and you tell me to get lost before I can even open my mouth.” The tears were streaming now. “Well screw you Sawyer. I thought maybe you’d listen to me, understand, but you’re a ******* and always will be.” Kate ran out of his tent.

Sawyer was stunned. He certainly hadn’t expected that. “Kate, wait!” he shouted. He burst out of his tent – she was nowhere to be seen. “Hey Hurley!” he yelled to the large man who just happened to be walking past at that time. “You seen Kate?”

“Er yeah, dude, she went that way.” He said, pointing to a path leading into the jungle. “She looked kinda upset.”

“Thanks” Sawyer said as he ran up the path. It didn’t take him long to find her – she was walking quickly through the jungle. He could hear her crying.

“Kate! Wait!” he yelled. She turned around and began to run when she saw him.

“Sawyer, just leave me alone!” she said through sobs. Sawyer quickly caught up with her and grabbed her arm. She tried to shake it off and keep going, but his grip was too strong. He took hold of her other arm and looked at her as she tried to avoid his gaze.

“Look, I ain’t gonna let you go, so you might as well talk to me.”

Kate stopped struggling and looked at him. She looked into his eyes and saw the hurt she’d caused him, she saw the emptyness and pain from his life that she had added to.

“Sawyer, I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you.. to push you away.. I just didn’t know.. I didn’t understand…”

“Understand what?”

“These feelings you made me feel Sawyer!” She was getting emotional again, the tears were falling and her voice was breaking. “You make me feel something I’ve never felt before… and I tried to fight it… but I couldn’t… and…” The tears were overpowering her ability to speak. Sawyer moved his hand up to her cheek and wiped them from under her eyes. He cupped her cheeks and kissed her; a deep, loving kiss. Kate let herself give in – she couldn’t fight it anymore, she couldn’t fight something that felt so right. Sawyer pulled away and held her close against his body. She relaxed into him, relief spreading over her as she realised she didn’t have to hide from her feelings anymore. He held her close, forgiving her for the hurt she’d caused. Each understood the other without saying a word, each holding the thing that they desired despite the pain it caused.

It's great, I absolutely love it :wub: :wub:
I think the title is ok as it is...

Aw, that's really good! :clap: I love the song Iris... :wub:

Thanks guys!!!

I love the song too! :wub: