(hope this is the right place)

Ok, so i was quite reluctant in posting this. I'm just a little confused at the moment.

So i met this guy who's 2 years older then me (Im 14, hes 16) on a website in December. We got along instantly and talk everyday on msn usually. Thing is I live in Germany due to my Dads job and he lives back home in England so we can only communicate via msn and the site we're both on.

Anyway over the past few weeks i have come to accept that I like him more then just a friend. Sometimes this makes me happy- its exciting and makes me feel good but other times it makes me feel sad as i dont know if he feels the same way and i can't be with him in real life.

There are signs that he could like me back- he's supportive, sensitive etc around me. There are other signs too but as i've never been in a relationship I'm not sure how he feels :s

We ask each other questions to find out more about each other and make up little scenarios to find out what we would do in a certain situation. He's had some dreams about me being his Girlfriend and most of my friends think he likes me but I don't want to risk making an idiot of myself.

I tried telling him once. I said: 'I think I like you, understand? I hope this doesn't change anything' to which he replied, 'k, i understand and it changes nothing :) '

I got really confused about this as it gave no indication to how he felt and it really did change nothing- it was like i never said anything. That was a few weeks ago and things are normal.

I know what he looks like as we often do webcam. He's a really nice guy and wouldn't do anything to purposely upset me.

If I think of any other additional information I will try and post it, also if you think of anything that could be useful for you to know to help me understand whats going on. I need some help with this. I've ended up telling loads of my friends trying to get some help but i'm still not convinced that i should tell him just yet. I don't want to look like some love-sick school girl. So does he like me? Does he fancy me a little bit? A lot?

Help needed >.<
Thanks
Natz~

ask him if he likes u. but it does sound like he does a bit or he would of probably been a bit different when u said that to him like 'omg she likes me i dont like her im leading her on' he would act different like that u kno

its only been 4 months maybe he didnt say something because hes still trying to figure out if he likes u or not. do u know if he would like someone he's never met or try to meet them?

Yeah, He's always nice to me and that and he makes me happy but i dunno i've never told someone I like them before and I'd be really upset if he didn't like me back. >.<

He is different to other guys i know so his reaction was different to other guys reactions when they found out i liked them. I don't know if it was just because he was being nice and understanding or if theres anything more to it...

I don't think he knows just how much I like him though. As we didn't talk about it- we've never talked about it. After i said what i said in the last post about telling him i was thinking about bringing the subject back up but was too nervous too plus i was feeling so stressed that week I even told my mum about how i felt (she knows him as the guy i talk to on msn all the time. I think she think he's my 'special friend' ) She told me what I knew she'd say- that we should just be friends. But i want more then that.

But what worried me is even if he did like me which would make me very happy :) there'd still be the problem of it being a long distance relationship which i know can work but that would be my next problem :S

We asked each other if we would ever be in an online relationship. Also what out opinions were on the subject.

I said that i would if i liked them. And that online relationships can have benefits such as being less nervous when you actually do meet that person for real and getting to know them for them.

He said it would depend on the people involved and their opinions on the subject.

sounds like hes not telling u what he real feels. maybe he is shy? ask him straight out so u dont have to wonder.

Yeah- I agree. Asking him straight out will stop any confusion.

However- can you and him deal with an online relationship? You have to have a great load of trust, you don't get all the sides of a relationship... I don't think online relationships work. And it might mess up things if you ask him.

He said "depending on the people" I would of said, well what if it was me.
I suppose that time has passed now and you can't really go back now. I know not much help :P

I would be subtle in asking him, beat around the bush, to try and get a answer. If he likes you he will probably tell you its just getting him to say it. Maybe ask him if he wants to "see each other" online and see what he says. I think its better to find out now then later when your really attached to him. Always keep in mind that you haven't met him before and people online can be 100% different in real life regardless of how much you believe them or think you know. Be careful!

Natz is my sister and I also talk to "the guy" who she likes on msn. Believe me, they seem to be made for each other :rolleyes: they quote eachother, think and like the same things, have inside jokes...they have a special, close relationship.

But again he could want to remain friends. This could be a "best friend" thing. I think she should actually ask him whether he considors her to be his best friend and then see what happens :)

It definetly seems like they have a 'thing' whether its a good friendship or more is beyond me. Your going to have to ask question to get answers, hes definetly not dropping any hints!! Since your sister knows him as well I think what she said is the best idea, ask him if he considers you to be a 'best-friend'. If he does then its obvious your close, but romanticly close? thats another question. :unsure:

Yeah he is shy and self concious which i think is cute and i am the same which is why im too nervous to ask him straight out :S

Yeah we definately trust each other- i tell him loads of stuff...i don''t know if he tells me any big secrets but we do confide in each other. I think we could try and make an online relationship work IF he felt the same way. Many people are in the same position and have made it work- my own cousin has an online relationship which has lasted ages. But if anything ever happened i would do my best to get it to work and look forward to actually meeting him some day.

Ah yeah that would have been a good idea. I'm all for the subtleness, that sounds like something that would be better for me as i'm not so confident with this stuff. Good points, he's a good guy and i know him but i understand that people can be different in real life and i will be careful if anything does come from this.

Aw thanks Jemma :) We definately have a 'weird connection' as he puts it, lol but i do want it to be one which is more then just friendship. And as it could be a best friend thing that just confuses me again as I don't know if we're just mates or something more? And Ok, I'll try and ask him if he thinks we're best friends.

I think i was gonna say something else but have forgotten :S If I remember I'll post it.

Oh yeah- does anyone get what his reply meant when i told him i liked him? I stated it in my 1st post. I don't think he completely understands how i feel? :s Maybe we're avoiding the subject? I dunno- this is where all the confusion comes >.<

I think maybe he needed to think and wasn't quite sure how to reply. It probably was the "I hope this doesn't change anything" that made him not make anything of it.

Next time you should think through carefully what you say and make sure it makes sense before you say something serious to him about your relationship. :)

Some guys, even if they like you alot, will not even attempt a relationship because they dont want to ruin the friendship. You both seem like u have a very close friendship already =\

You mean is 'k I understand and it changes nothing' response? Seems like he is just saying okay thats cool it wont change anything. Not really meaning anything.

Maybe jemma...


But I meant meaning about how he feels? Did that mean that he didn't feel the same way? That he didn;t wanna say anything? That he's confused about how i feel or what it means? :S :S

arg....i dunno

Honestly he didn't say one way or another lol

That is true.

Either he doesn't like you and doesn't want to tell you or he does like you and doesn't/didn't want to tell you.

Yeah and I'm too cowardly to do anything about it :S :(

You should tell him how much you like him and ask him out. The worse that can happen is that he'll say no but then at least you'll know and wont have to keep thinking about it.

Yeah that is the best thing. Sometimes i say I will and then chicken out >.<

Maybe I should get a friend to casually mention it? I read that somewhere...

Wow ok.

1: lol, he made fun of me today...as a joke
2: We add 'ius' on the end of our names sometimes so im 'Nattius'
3: I think he remembers most stuff but not others...maybe stuff I've even forgotten
4: I think he does talk to me slightly differently to other people but i can only talk to him on msn. I guess coz we're close he can be more himself and open up a bit.
5: My friends talk to him about me. I think they mention me to see what he says.

So...thats actually pretty good right?

Also today he asked me a scenario that he said he just that minute thought of. (remember i said we give each other scenarios) He asked me what i would do if his friend asked me out. I said id ask him why he'd asked me out as we dont know each other very well as he's not online very often. And then i said i'd have to say no as i wouldn't feel the same why.

I then asked him why he had asked that and what he would do if my friend asked him out.

He said he asked me coz it was random Oo And that he knows Sam a bit but he thinks she has a boyfriend and he'd have to say no as he wouldn't feel the same way.

Just thought that might be interesting...

I really think he likes you. :) By your last post , I'm almost convinced.

Aww, they really should go out- sorry just sisterly comments :P

Ask him out, I mean why not? What do you have to loose? You like him, he seems to like you. Its not unusual for a girl to ask a guy now a days, and if hes shy he will probably love it that you did. Then you will know.

Natz is a very shy person..maybe practise saying what you should say like I mentioned before?

Remember, you have nothing to be nervous about. Guys typically love being asked out, since they're the ones usually doing all the work in these situations. Asking someone out online, I don't know how you do that. Could you wait till you meet him in person? or just say " I think your really cool and we get along great, do you want to date online?"

Yeah I just need to gear up the confidence >.< I'll try. I'll have a think.

And I'm afraid I can't meet him at least until i move back to england which won't be for a few years about 2 a bit years. So I'll be around the age he is now and he'll be even older. I hope that won't change anytning and that we will meet eventually. So it would have to be an online relationship but they if it works for my cousin and loads of other people then it could work for me, right?

Yeah so I will try and get the confidence to do something about it and I have to say your comments are making me a bit more confident :)

Think of how happy you will be when he says yes! :tup: :tup:

OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! He likes youuuu!

:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

Just say some thing like what Killerstyle said. It will be fine! HE'll love the fact you asked him out if he's shy. And tell us how it goes when you ask him!
x x x x

It's funny you say that because our cousin is called Kerry and wait a minute...
:P
XD

oh my god.....oh my god!!

OH MY GOOOOOOD

Ok so i told him

it took everything i had but i told him.

I said he was really great and wondered if he wanted to be more then just friends.

he needed time to think and he was worried that if everything went wrong we wouldn't be friends anymore.

So we discussed that for a while and then msn bgred up and we needed to restart.

After the restart he said he'd made a descision and he said he'd be happy to be more then just friends.

I was really happy and suprised. and like: OH MY GAH!!

I still need to keep this thread open though as I've never had a boyfriend before, never mind an online one so I'll need help and advice.

But for now i can't really believe it. I don't think its sunk in.

Thank you all so much :)

If you want my advice, based on experience, be forgiving. Don't hold a grudge on small things. But if he does something stupid, and I know he will (I thought I never would) then do something about it. This is online, so you still have a life off-line. As exciting as it may seem, don't go fast, go at your own pace. Just be sure you don't love being in love, but you love him.

That's all from me, hope things work out.

Thanks Marzon.

Now I just gotta get my msn to work :S

You're welcome.

That's another thing with the internet. Your means of communication can never be reliable. Either one can have something come up and can't tell each other. You might take a break for a while and won't be able to know. Just have another way for contact if the first doesn't work.

:rockon:

Thats awesome. Seeeee I told you!!!


Just post new threads for whatever problems you come across with your relationship :P :D :D :D :D :D :D

MSN can suck sometimes hey.

Maybe get Yahoo and AIM so that when MSN fails you can use one of them. ;) Theres your back-up.

They coud write letters I suppose?

Yes, or call each other. Both of which I talked about with my friend once. I was thinking about online, but yes. That works good as well.

Calling can be expensive if you live far away- get skype so you can call over the internet. Or, set up a proboards forum, set it to prvate so only you and him can veiw it and you can write stuff to each other if your not online at the same time. Letters are nice, but they take a while, but they're lovely to recieve.

How is the relationship so far? you must really trust each other.