Scumbos: McGregor, Hutton, Cuellar, Weir, Papac, McCulloch, Ferguson, Thomson, Adam, Cousin, Novo. Subs: Carroll, Faye, Naismith, Beasley, Whittaker, Lennon, Emslie.

Goals: Ratboy 27, 77 (pen). Fergushun 55

Booked: McGregor, Hutton.

Celtic: Boruc, O'Dea, Caldwell, McManus, Naylor, Nakamura, Donati, Scott Brown, Sno, Jarosik, McDonald. Subs: Mark Brown, Riordan, Kennedy, O'Brien, McGeady, Cuthbert, Bjarnason.

Booked: Boruc, O'Dea, Kennedy, Naylor, McGeady, Donati, Brown, Jarosik, McDonald.

Referee: M ‘Dirty Orange Baptist’ McCurry

Att: 50,428

We went into this game with the usual mix of confidence and trepidation. Confidence coming from the fact that we walk on two legs, not four, and trepidation, because we just knew that FC Bung would kick, punch, knock, scrap and dive their way up the park whenever the referee wasn’t looking.

Which was often.

However, we can’t blame the referee for our own shortcomings, and there were many. In three short years, Celtic have been changed from a side which had strength in every department, which fought for every ball and which was full of Hunskelpers into one which was more than happy to roll over at the first hint of pressure from Der Stench.

I have no desire to relive this game, it hurt enough just logging onto the BBC page to get the teams and attendance, but I’ll summarise the basics.

The game opened in typical derby match format, with both sides looking to control their own play while forcing the opposition at every possible chance, with neither side having either clear cut chances or consistent possession of the ball. But soon the Mankies started to apply pressure, i.e. needle us, we react, they go free and we get a booking. We lost our two Scotts, McDonald and Brown, in this way.

We should have known better. The Huns wanted to immobilise us, and with two combative and energetic Celts out the game it was Round 1 to them.

The sucker punch was about to come. A poor clearance fell straight to the feet of an onrushing Hun and they managed to work the ball onto the wing. From here the ball was crossed in towards Rangers front man, Gary Caldwell, who deftly dummied the ball allowing Ratboy to sneak a clumsy header past The Holy Goalie.

He, of course, celebrated as if he had just beaten five men and then volleyed it in from 40 yards with his arse and left the pitch.

Booking?

Don’t be silly. Huns don’t get booked for scoring.

There was nothing of real note from the Celts in response to this, a long range shot from Jarosik was about as good as it got, and even that wasn’t any good.

1-0 at half-time was a very fair scoreline for a toothless Celtic side who were allowing themselves to be bullied in every single position. A memorable team talk clearly never took place, as Celtic returned to the field and, after a 5 minute spell where we shocked even ourselves by playing coherently, we promptly surrendered the game to the Filth.

Not long after the restart the Huns again managed to work the ball up to their target man, Caldwell, who managed to nod down expertly to his teammate. Captain Pugwash finished the chance and then did ‘a Ratboy’ by leaving the pitch.

Booking? I’ll give you three guesses.

Sadly folks, that is where the match report ends, as your correspondent immediately retired to a dark room.

All was lost.

Apparently, though, the Huns scored again, with a penalty this time.

And by all accounts it was legal, which certainly saved Brother McCurry the hassle of inventing an incident.

The only bright spark came from the Polish Provo. His refusal to shake hands with the cheats of Rangers, who, only moments before, had been urging the referee to punish him and whose supporters had yet again religiously abused him (after being given free reign to do so) showed that at least one Celt knows what we feel.

He rightly encouraged them to insert their empty gestures of ‘fair play’ into whichever orifice best suited.

We must move on from this incident, and Benfica is the perfect chance to do this. No-one will be assaulting us, no-one will be playing the Celtic edition of Happy Families and no-one will be flinging bigotry at out players.

Most importantly, though, Saturday was a lesson that even we can’t fail to learn. If the same mistakes are made and the same lacklustre performance given then the team and the management should take a very close look at themselves.

HAIL HAIL